Tis the Season Day 1: Ugly Ornaments

Every year, my family goes to one of the local Christmas tree farms and picks out a tree.  When I was little, in order to mark what ones we liked, my parents used my brothers and I as living markers.  We’d be told to stand by certain trees as they went off to look at more.

Since we are all in or beyond college, picking out the tree as a family no longer happens. But decorating said tree?  We go all out.

You see, we have this massive box of Christmas ornaments.  Most of them have been around as long as I have been alive.  (Or longer.)  Most of them are also hideous.  There’s some caroling rats with fez hats, large wooden fish, floppy quilted angels, weird crocheted candy canes, and even a sand dollar with a tree painted on it.

When we were little, Mom was crafty.  Wanting the tree to look elegant and socially presentable, she hid all the ugly ornaments, omitting them from the options.  Being small children, my brothers and I never noticed.  As time passed, though, Mom was unable to get her hands on the ornaments soon enough and they were discovered.  It wasn’t long before we began sneaking them onto the Christmas tree.  At first, it was only a few a year.  Their appearances grew more and more frequent as we aged. By high school, my brothers and I were in charge of decorating the tree by ourselves.  Without parental supervision, decorating became a game.  As we dragged the massive box of ornaments from the basement, we gave each other mischievous smiles.  How many ugly ornaments could we get away with this year? How much can we piss Mom off and still get presents?

Last night, my little brother and I played the yearly Ugly Ornaments game. We were home alone with No one to hold us back. We went covered every of that tree. It’s a monstrosity! Sam and I are so proud.

Later, when Mom walked into the house after work, she looks at us and goes, “How many ugly ornaments will I have to sneak off the tree this year?”

I smiled.  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”


What are your family traditions regarding decorating the tree?  Tell me about it in the comments!

Want to contribute to Tis the Season? Let me know!

One thought on “Tis the Season Day 1: Ugly Ornaments

  1. Happy Lifeaholic December 18, 2014 / 10:43 pm

    You should put up a picture ^_^

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