These days it feels like every time I open Facebook, someone I know has either gotten engaged, married, or pregnant. When it started happening a few years ago, the people were my brother’s age–older, more mature. Now, it’s my peers who are tying the knot and starting families.
Every time this happens, a little pang goes through my stomach.
I still feel like such a kid. In my head, I’m still that ten-year old girl who often asked herself: “What do I want to be when I grow up?” In the eyes of the world, however, I’m a legal adult starting a career. You would think that three months of farm work and endless time spent in my head would help me put two and two together. But I’m still relatively clueless.
I’ve thought about a lot of things. It’s my dream of all dreams to do Christian ministry work in Europe. But I’m beginning to see that dreams don’t happen overnight. Any European plans are likely to be down the road. What, then, shall I do in the meantime?
Should I go back to school and become a teacher? Should I take the GRE, apply to grad school, and become a librarian? Should I just take a random job, just to start somewhere, and reevaluate? If I do the last option, should that job be in my home community? In the cities? In a state far away?
So many questions. So few answers.
Why is growing up so hard?